A Little Odd: Skitterbug

You know the old saying, ‘Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker’?  Well, this time ‘round the old oak tree is similar in vein to that phrase.  Only in reverse.  Or something.  ‘Blasters are faster but strikers are nicer.’  I like brawling: I can’t deny it or help it.  As I’ve said before, I really enjoy the thrill of the hunt.  Pinning the opposing monster in with units and the map, then actually managing to do consistent damage is where I really like to play.  Oh, I’ve got my fair share of ranged goodness, but it just isn’t the same.  Really brawling well takes patience and more than a little guile: you need to know when to draw in the other guy by sacrificing a few of your own.  Sometimes you need to break a few eggs to make an omelet, and considering the fact that there’s a LOT of egg potential in this army, you’re going to be making a lot of breakfast.

I’m gonna level with you: I feel sorry for the Planet Eaters.  I know that a –lot- of people don’t even bother with them, for varied reasons, of course, but the primary one seems to circle around the limited mobility of the monsters.  Of course, I can’t really deny the fact that three of the four non-morpher monsters couldn’t outmaneuver a wheelchair on ice.  Covered in oil.  With marbles on top.  I would have said ‘cherries’, but they’re fairly squishy and not many people are going to have an image of the Three PE Stooges ‘nyuk nyuk nyuking’ it up on fruit, other than a banana.  The point is, with no movement powers, most of their monsters simply have to trudge across the map, trying to avoid the pitfalls of unit devastation.  Or, they could take the ‘wait and see’ approach, luring the other guy over into the playground o’ pain.  Neither choice is all that fantastic, but both work well enough, given the right timing, luck and skill.

Or, you could avoid all that nonsense and go for the guy with a car.  Yeah, his dad paid for it, but you only turn sixteen once!  Xaxor, I’ve found, is pretty fun.  On the surface, he appears to be a brawler, with Blue Charge on all forms and a sturdy frame built for getting right up in the other monster’s face.  Not that I’d necessarily recommend that, mind you: ever get a whiff of Mucustos’ breath after an all-night bender at Denny’s?  But, when you do more than glance at Xaxor, you’ll see that his Ultra form is pretty brutal.  He’s still got that brawl potential, but he’s also going to light you up without a second thought.  Sure, his Defense isn’t really good enough to stand toe-to-toe with some of the heavy hitters in the game, but it’s good enough for now.  If only for now…

I’m guessing you figured out that this is a Planet Eater army chock full of brawling goodness.  Stick and move, little guys!  With my heartfelt apologies to George Michael and Wham!, I present: Skitterbug

(1) Xaxor                                (4) Harbinger Comet Shard

(1) Ultra Xaxor                      (4) Cathedral

(4) Chomper                          (1) Oil Refinery

(2) Chomper Elite                (1) Music Producer

(2) Explodomite                   (1) Publishing House

(2) Razor Beetle Elite         (1) Newspaper Building

(2) Steel Back Roach

(2) Mollok Berserker

(1) Tanglix

Straight up, old school brawling.  You’re looking at very little in the way of control, forgoing the possibility of P-Dice in exchange for a quick across-the-board stream of chittering, skittering bugs.  And some mole men.  And a tentacled terror.  Two buildings represent a very strong force that should be held and a third offering a tantalizing potential launch point.  Or lunch point, depending upon which side of the biting you happen to land.  All in all, this is everything you thought an Odd brawling should be.

Xaxor, as I stated, is probably the most balanced, not to mention upwardly mobile, monster in the Planet Eater’s arsenal.  Seriously, the guy’s got a really nice 401k.  In Alpha form, your opponent is staring down the barrel of a 7 Defense monster with decent speed with both strong Brawl –and- Blast attacks.  Hellfire, even his Power attack is nothing to shrug off.  However, in both forms, what truly makes Xaxor stand out is the combination of Jump and Charge.  Individually, each has their place and purpose, but in this specific army, the duo serves as the primary foundation.  Global Jump means never having to put baby in a corner.  Where they go, you follow.  I’m trying to work the mechanics out on exactly how Xax enables his Scarabaeidae followers to leap over the Imperial State building with a single bound, but I imagine it really doesn’t much matter.  Then, the matter of Global Charge leaps to the foreground.  See what I did there?  Here’s where things get fun.  Not only does Charge help the X-man hit, it really makes everyone else in this army so much more dangerous.  When powered up, the Ultra form just makes things that much more dangerous, while providing the other guy with a glass cannon to chuck stones at.  Weapon Master on an impressive Blast means never having to look forlornly at the other kids with Annihilate.  Following Fire, generally, is reserved for the annoying pest units so that Xaxor might focus his beam o’ beamyness on bigger, nastier targets.

In another army, Knickers in a Twist, I stated that Chompers were a gamble.  In that instance, they certainly were a highly suspect choice, considering what I was attempting to do with them.  In this army, however, I’ve given them a home where they can roam, alongside the Splodolos, and the skies aren’t cloudy all day, save for the showers of insides raining down after a successful run.  I’m not terribly interested in Feeding Frenzy, even though should it happen to take effect.  There: I said it.  I’m not going to try forcing my monster to play pattycake with one unit just for that extra damage.  Now, if it should happen to naturally occur, via luck or serendipity, I wouldn’t say ‘no’ to Super Damage.  Instead, the Chomper’s primary reason for being here is his penchant for biting.  And gnashing, but mostly the biting.  2+1 brawl on grunts is such a nice way to begin a relationship, and it really only gets better.  Again, we see a Speed of 5 being used, allowing for rather decent mobility, which, coupled with granted Jump, means you’re looking at nasty ticks.  A healthy 3 Defense also means these guys are pretty sturdy and will, generally, require group tactics to eliminate.  Finally, there’s Red Energy Cycle.  Here’s the thing about making good use of Energy Cycle: you’re going to miss with A-Dice.  It –will- happen.  And, when it does, you’ve just made your next unit attack slightly more likely to hit.  Hey, it might not mean much, but the difference between a hit and a miss can oftentimes be tracked down to a .67% chance.  I’ll take the addition any day of the week.

Explodomites are, far and away, some of the most feared brawlers in the game, and for good reason!  These guys don’t just bring a knife to the gunfight, seeing as their whole pointed body is the knife; they bring a small tactical nuclear warhead.  But that alone isn’t really why they are such terrific additions to this army.  I mean, sure, affecting nine squares on a Brawl is certainly a way to endear you to someone, but is it enough?  No, no it isn’t, Martha.  To really make a statement, you need more than ‘flash’: you need substance, kid.  For instance, if you’re looking for a respectable speed, 5 is a good place to start.  Then, when no one is looking, toss in a brutal Defense of 4.  Care to make a wager how often this guy will draw Cover?  Yeah, lots of luck taking this guy out with just one unit attacking.  Multiple unit attraction is the final piece in this puzzle.  When Splodeyface draws the attention of the opposition, he draws is big time.  The other guy knows that if he fails to take care of the ‘Mite, the ‘Mite’s going to take care of him.  Nuff said.

If you’ve read my stuff since Now! has been released, you’d already be well aware of my fascination, NAY, love of the Razor Beetle.  Not only can the little guy open a can of tomato paste in less than 2 seconds, he also brings serious pain to every army, regardless of Faction or Agenda.  5 Speed and 4 Defense makes his guy, again, quite a touch little macadamia nut to crack, and that is completely unintentional, I assure you.  I’m lying, of course: if you’re going to run with the dogs of war, you’re going to need to have your butt insured, as well as heavily armored.  I chose to only include the Elites due to army size limitations rather than simply throwing in a free B-Die.  In all honesty, the B-Dice pool like water after a torrential downfall in the Amazon Basin with this army, so I am not simply doing it for greed.  Lust is also involved: see first sentence of this paragraph.  Blitz, again, cannot be highlighted enough.  ‘Dice in play’ have become my muse, my mistress, my lover.  My wife is not happy.  Anytime I can gather one other unit, and that’s going to happen without fail, this guy just becomes a pure animal.  But, the Beetle isn’t just an offensive juggernaut!  Oh no, this little Tyrian (I’ll be happy to explain that one, should you really want to know) tyrant makes life miserable just by being!  He’s that one extra point of damage needed to finish a form.  He’s the moderately irritating dissuader of Rampage attacks through your powerbase.  He is the terror that flaps in the night!  On that note…

The Steel Back Roach.  He’s really quite sexy, when you think about it.  Here’s a unit with, let’s be honest with ourselves here, all but no offensive power to speak of, yet he’s painted by every laser-guided bunker buster as soon as he hits the board.  And what, pray tell, has this mutagenicly-gifted scorpoach done to deserve such ire?  Nothing.  Yet.  But he will, rest assured.  Red Forcefield and Shelter are difficult enough to swallow, making this little beast the best friend of everything listed above him, but what really gets under your opponent’s skin, like a ‘roid raged scabies mite, is Pathfinder. Get him close enough and you’ll be looking at a coin-flipped chance of powerbase disruption, screen cracking and downright general unpleasantness.  And, if that weren’t bad enough, the little bug offers up Pathfinder to his buddies!  Sure, you can only use it once per unit turn, but you can also use it once per monster activation, and that’s a potential screen denial waiting to happen.  Helloooooooooooooo, Nurse!

You know why I have Mollok Berserkers in here?  I’ll tell you why and I sincerely appreciate you asking.  That was very thoughtful and I think your mother did a fantastic job of raising such a nice young person.  I like the Berserkers because when I intentionally refer to them as Mollusk Berserkers, it makes ‘em mad.  Real mad.  And you wouldn’t like them when they’re angry, but I would.  Rage is a powerful emotion, and it only makes things more nasty when you just turned every single attack from the ‘Zerker into a P-Die gathering festival.  Did I mention the fact that these guys are berserkers?  Yeah?  I thought so.  Let’s go ahead and give them a free B-Die just for them being the fun-loving chaps we all knew they were!  A 2+2 leaping, angry, nimble spiral-cut ham-faced beastie capable of cutting your bloody arm off will always be a welcomed addition to any brawling army I have.  Honestly, what more is there to say?

Finally, we arrive at the slightly oddball unit: the Tanglix.  What?  Me have a unit in an Odd army that seems oddly out of place?  I know, I was surprised, too.  He has no innate B-Dice, he’s a ground pounder, a little slow and EGADS, look at those teeth, but he’s still got moxie, and in this game, moxie matters.  Radial Attack is one of those abilities you see coming at you and things start churning in the ol’ brainpan.  ‘That can’t be good.  I should probably spread my units.  Crap, did I leave the iron on?’  Things like that.  He’s a worry-inducer.  But, what’s more than that, he’s a fairly good decoy.  Much like the Explodomite, people don’t like seeing mass amount of their units falling victim to one well-placed attack, so they tend to keep one eye on the offending unit, and the other on everything else.  Split attention means you’re bound to take advantage of opportunities which present themselves.  Make certain you take full advantage.

I feel inclined to include the Harbinger Comet Shard in this army because it’s just fun.  You want a free P-Die on your unit’s first activation?  Sure thing!  Want to really drive your point home on a big Smash or Throw?  Spire’s your buddy!  Want to see an Explodomite Elite?  Welcome to Crazyworld!  In short, I do it because it annoys people to see the Comet on the board, and they know there’s really not much use for it other than to make them stay far, far away.  I do it for the lulz.  Four Cathedrals?  Surely you’re mad!  No, I’m not, and don’t call me…No, I’m not going to say it.  Listen, I already have four buildings with Spire, so why not make it another four more?  And, if I’m not going to be able to heal my monster, you better believe I’m going to make it more difficult for the other guy to heal –his- monster.  Here’s where things get more dicey.  The Oil Refinery really, really helps this army become dangerous, for obvious reasons, but when paired with the Newspaper Building, you’re looking at fleet-footed crevice-dwellers that get to run wild for free.  Truly, if you can get, and keep, this little building ballet going, the other guy won’t like you much.  Then, the other duo pops up from the distance.  The Music Producer and the Publishing House really serve all brawling armies well.  Hold both targets and you’ve got far more swagger in your unit placement than you may have otherwise had.  Global Disarm and Distract are just too brutal to ever be allowed to live.

If you don’t like brawlers, again, this army probably won’t change your mind.  Also, if you play against it, and the person sitting across from you can really get things grinding, you’ll really not like brawling armies.  The whole point to this army, like so many other creations of mine, is singular: Charge.  Move, hit hard, then move and attack again.  Truly, to win on a regular basis with a brawling army means you –must- outmaneuver the other guy, and not a lot of brawlers out there can get the job done.  This one has the chance.  Why do I say that?  Well, for starters, this little beauty took down a fully operational Death Star, armed with T.I.E Strike Fighters.  Now, there was a healthy dose of luck involved, but don’t you dare try to take that victory away from me!  I had to bust my buns for that ‘W’, and it was worth it.  Overall, what this army does, time and again, is overwhelm the defense of whatever it rolls up to, and then moves on.  It’s basically the Monsterpocalypse equivalent of driver ants: see it, eat it, and move on.  If that doesn’t make your skin crawl, you really have been following A Little Odd, and that makes you ok in my book.